Sage Advice to Help Women Grads Successfully Navigate the World of Work
By Deb Boelkes, Business World Rising June 27, 2023
Each year when eager grads launch into the exciting unknowns of new careers, I inevitably receive requests for guidance on how young women can best overcome the myriad of obstacles they are likely to find in the workplace.
After years in Fortune 500 leadership and as the founder of a leadership development firm dedicated to the advancement of women to the top of the ladder, it’s disappointing that women still face a variety of career challenges that their male counterparts simply don’t. Women still receive fewer promotions, lower wages for equivalent jobs, and fewer seats in the C-suite and boardroom, and their upward mobility is still impacted by the so-called “motherhood penalty.”
When I launched into my own career four decades ago, big businesses, government, and the military were far more male-dominated than today. Back then, women had to figure out on their own how best to overcome the gamut of obstacles they uniquely faced. The lessons I learned and the barriers I surprisingly overcame—in what was essentially a man’s world—happened in a trial by fire.
The good news is that many of us who managed to ascend the ladder are willing to share what we’ve learned with the next generation of rising women leaders, so they won’t have to reinvent the wheel. Besides, isn’t this what equity should be about: seasoned women sharing their tribal knowledge with their younger sisters, to facilitate their recognition and pursuit of all the wonderful opportunities that exist to leverage their strong suits and succeed as leaders?
In hopes that, going forward, aspiring female leaders will spend their time and energy learning new lessons and breaking new barriers, I’m going to address the most common questions that I, and some of the “women on top” that I’ve interviewed, routinely hear. We hope this sage advice will enable today’s women graduates to enter the workplace with confidence and grace.
How should I dress for an interview or on the job?
Even in this day and age (like it or not), appearance matters. Always dress for success, no matter where you are in your career. While expectations regarding appearance and attire are not nearly as stringent as they once were, your appearance impacts how others perceive you. Consider every day to be a dress rehearsal, whether you’re on a job interview or on the job working toward whatever goal you have for your career.
The best way to make a terrific first impression—on a job interview or when meeting a new client, colleague, superior, or potential employee—is to immediately present the best version of yourself. The key word here is immediately.
For better or worse, it’s long been said that it takes just seven seconds to make a lasting impression. Whether you are meeting a potential hiring manager, a potential peer, or other key influencer, if you don’t look and act the part within those first seven seconds, the person you are meeting might decide they don’t want to hear what you have to say. You should try to distinguish yourself as someone they would like to know better in just those first few seconds. The key is to help them feel positively intrigued by your presence and appearance.
One timeless rule that never goes out of style is this: Dress for the job you want, not for the job you have. Wherever you work—or want to work—pay attention to what the leaders at least two levels above your current position (or the job you are interviewing for) are wearing , and follow their lead. Make it easy for these leaders to envision you as a leader.
The inaugural President of the Milken Center for Advancing the American Dream, Kerry Healey, Ph.D., formerly served as the Lieutenant Governor of Massachusetts. Dr. Healey quickly learned when running for office that virtually every day was like a job interview because she was continually meeting new people. She learned how important it was to stay focused on making the best first impression possible, again and again—in those oh-so-critical first seven seconds—every time she was in public. Subsequently, she found that presence mattered just as much in fields where individuality, creativity, and informality were the norm.
So, here’s my advice: Don’t think of it as dressing to “please” others. You aren’t. All of us—men and women—should use our appearance as a tool to positively influence how others respond to us.
If you feel you need specific guidance on what to wear in a certain environment, seek out a successful female leader in that industry—perhaps someone you know and admire, or a friend of your family. Most women are happy to share such things.
Which job is the right one for me?
It can be somewhat challenging to know precisely what a new position or organization might be like, so keep in mind that a job interview is a two-way street. Not only is the interview process the company’s chance to get to know you and assess how you might fit within their culture, it’s also your opportunity to ask relevant, in-depth questions to uncover as much as possible about what working there might be like and how you might best add value to the team.
Try to assess if the position will provide opportunities for you to learn new skills and grow your knowledge base. Ideally, this will be in an environment where you can be happy and enthusiastic, and where there’s long-term potential for lateral and upward mobility.
A job that is right for you will allow you to leverage your strong suits; where you’ll feel comfortable being yourself and enjoy your responsibilities. Any job or culture that will make you feel like an imposter, or like a square peg in a round hole, won’t ever be right for you.
Before you start your search, ask yourself one very important question: “What are my strong suits?” If you haven’t ever considered this before, you may find this question surprisingly challenging to answer.
A strong suit isn’t just something you’re good at; it should also bring you joy and tie into your purpose in life. Your strong suits are that special blend of strengths and passions that propel you forward while giving you energy and focus. To help you zero in on these sometimes-elusive strengths, how they manifest in your life, and how to best leverage them, I’ve found that online assessments can be very helpful. Many will also give you some insights regarding how to deploy your strong suits in the workplace. CliftonStrengths and the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator are two good starting points.
While it’s always good to have an end goal in mind for your career, remember that your first job, or any job throughout your career, is not a life sentence. As Linda Rutherford, Executive Vice President and Chief Communications Officer of Southwest Airlines, told me about one’s first job, “From it, you will learn the things that you really enjoy doing. You will potentially learn some things that you will not want to spend your life doing. I think that college graduates put a lot of pressure on themselves to make that first role that perfect role. It just may not be.”
Always stand ready and willing to take advantage of other serendipitous opportunities that may come along when you least expect it, especially if the opportunity will allow you to take greater advantage of your strong suits.
How can I stand out from the crowd?
Focusing on what you are great at and love doing will elevate your performance and enhance your authenticity. This will allow you to stand out from the crowd. Leveraging your strong suits can not only give you a big leg up; it will also help you become the best version of yourself. As we’ve already discussed, if you don’t readily know your strong suits, take an assessment to identify them.
When I asked Lieutenant General Kathleen M. Gainey, U.S. Army Retired, “What would you say to those women who want to stand out from the crowd and get promoted?” she said this: “My advice is to do the best job you can do in every job. Ask a lot of questions. Learn as much as you can about all the different aspects of your work. Become competent in everything you do….Help your people become the best they can be and empower them. Ensure they know what to do, how they fit into the bigger picture, and give them the authority to make changes for the better….Do what you love doing. If you are not doing that, work on finding a different job. If you love what you do, you will thrive. I loved the military and the people I worked with. It was so much fun—it wasn’t work.”
Here’s the bottom line: The things that give you the most joy are usually the things that hold special meaning for you. Focusing on the things you love to do and find joy in will allow you to stand out from the crowd and give your life more meaning.
Is it possible to “have it all”?
The concept of “having it all”—and whether that’s even possible—has sparked fierce debate. For most women, the phrase “having it all” usually means gracefully balancing motherhood and career. In reality, it’s more likely to be a juggling act than a graceful balancing of all the various aspects of your life. Based on my own experience and the feedback I’ve received from fellow executive mothers, it is totally possible for women to enjoy a fulfilling career and a strong family life, but success in this endeavor must be a team effort.
The key is to find what works best for your own personal situation at any given point in time. This will probably change throughout the different stages of your ever-evolving life. Of course, just when we think we’ve found the perfect answer, life has a way of changing. But that’s what life is all about—it’s a journey of learning and preparation for handling even bigger challenges in the future.
It was interesting for me to discover the various magic tricks the C-Suite women I have mentored and interviewed employed to juggle their home lives, their kids’ schooling and extracurricular activities, their involvement in community affairs, and of course, their own high-powered careers. Their stories are a testament to there being no one best sure-fire approach to having it all.
Just like building a successful executive career, raising children demands large amounts of time, energy, and emotional investment. Sharing the load with others who are also invested in your child’s future should not be seen as a weakness or failure, but as a prudent decision to enhance everyone’s well-being. You’ll need a supportive partner, a trusted network of family and friends, or reliable outside childcare—often all the above.
The great news is that we can learn from each other and then adjust all those lessons to fit our own situations. We don’t have to reinvent the wheel.
Whether you are just starting out in your career, or transitioning into a new role, you are not alone. Everyone can be more successful when high-powered women advise and support their sisters—in person, online, or through videos, podcasts, and books. Whichever way works best for you, I urge you to seek out seasoned role models. One day you may become a seasoned and sought-after mentor yourself.
Deb Boelkes is the author of Strong Suit: Leadership Success Secrets From Women on Top. Deb is not just a role model and heartfelt leader; she’s the ultimate authority on accelerating the advancement of aspiring leaders to the top of best places to work. She has 25+ years in Fortune 150 high-tech firms, leading superstar business development and professional services teams. As an entrepreneur, she has accelerated advancement for women eager to achieve success. Deb has delighted and inspired over 1,000 audiences across North America and beyond. For more information, please visit www.businessworldrising.com.